My Next Step: Not Sure?!

When you’re unsure, take your sweet time. Relax at home, light up a few and write down a few stories, read a few books and don’t shower for as long as you want.

Get up late every morning, and enjoy being lazy. Once you’re out of the ‘I need to catch up on all the sleep I lost’ phase, you’ll be out of it for good and carry on with life like it was meant to be lived.

So basically, I’ve thought about pursuing my long-lost passion for music, and carrying out what’s been in my blood since forever: pursuing the artist in me, and carrying out the legacy of our family: seeing the beauty in art.

But how do we pursue something that we have always dreamt of having, but not everyone around you is supportive of it?

What about those things that you really love, but you cannot pursue them just because you have so many other responsibilities, and people want you to pursue those responsibilities first? What about the fact that if you don’t get done with those responsibilities, you cannot really be happy about pursuing your passion? And what is because of those responsibilities taking up so much of your time, you’re never fully able to go after your passion full-fledged, and your dreams turn into regrets later on in life.

Yes, something like that has happened to me, since the last 10 years of my life that I’ve wasted working on other things, pursuing other projects, making money and doing things I didn’t really want to do, but doing them anyway because they make me money and make me feel financially secure.

Well, guess what, I really don’t want to be financially secure anymore. I want to dare to be different, I want to do something I love. I want to have blonde, messy hair and lots of piercings and I want to play piano and sing my kind of songs.

I don’t want to be the average Joe pleasing everyone, anymore. I don’t want to live my life for others, for making others happy, for appearing strong and independent in front of everyone, for appearing like I have a stable income and salary and OH WOW I’m an independent woman, in front of everyone. I want to be my own person, I want to live my dream before it’s too late. I want to continue and become a good person who is satisfied spiritually, who has devoured soul food to the maximum and can now feed others and help people around. When the soul is empty and devoid of what it needs, you cannot really feel REAL happiness or make others around you happy.


People often forget that, and trample other people’s desires and dreams. Well, I would literally say FUCK YOU to those kind of people, who have no ambitions of their own, and don’t want others to have them also. If someone doesn’t want a clean house, or nice things around them to remind them that life is beautiful and you can decorate your house according to your choices, it doesn’t mean they should rob others around of their ideas of a ‘homely environment, or a comfortable home’. I BEG TO DIFFER. Everyone needs to live their life ACCORDING to their own standards, and not someone else’s. Obviously, someone who doesn’t quite get the fact that all of this is necessary for another individual’s mental, home or visual/physical needs, would not understand why they need half of the things they need.


So here it is, my secret recipe to staying happy. Just do your thing, and keep doing it till you become a professional in it. Doesn’t matter if it makes you money or not, if you’re really into it and it’s the only thing that can bring you peace, fuck the money and go with the flow.

Money will come along, and maybe you will find a career suitable to your passion, and maybe you will be able to work someplace part-time, making money and following your passion at the same time.

Toodles for now, stay tuned for more insights by me!




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